I started this blog for the LOVED one...

Now it's for the LOST one...

It came to my senses again.
The reason why I was afraid of love.
I am inadequate.
I have low self-esteem.
I fear my weakness.
And today, it's taken a toll on me.

I have ego. A terrible one.
I am aware of my ego.
From the time it happened.
To this moment.
I will NOT let my guard down.
Not for any man.
And it's taking its toll right now.

I want to stay by your side.
I want to be your strength.
I want to be your hope.
But I am weak. And I am egoistic.
I won't let you pay for my suffering.
It's time I let you go.

I only wish you know the truth.
I won't apologize because I know it hurts.
It hurts YOU most if you want me back.
It's better this way, to be hated.
So you won't know love hurts.

I am sorry for not being able to say sorry.
I can only apologize here.
For every wrong doing I've done.
I can promise you the sky, the moon and the stars.
But the truth is, I don't want you to suffer.

I have no regret within the past year.
The only regret I have is not being able to celebrate your birthday.
I hope you well. I know you will.
You're a great person. You really are.
If only you know this feelings I have...